S&M
Song Meaning

“S&M” reworks the childhood taunt “sticks and stones may break my bones” into “but chains and whips excite me,” flipping a line about enduring insults into a declaration that provocation and controversy turn Rihanna on rather than hurt her 1. Co-writer Ester Dean has described stumbling on the original saying and reimagining its second half as the moment the hook came together 1. Despite its overtly kinky title and S&M imagery, the song has been described as not meant to be taken as a literal statement about sexual preferences 1, functioning more as a metaphor for embracing being “bad,” judged, or misunderstood and enjoying it anyway.

The meaning

At its core, “S&M” is built on a single lyrical pivot: the old warning “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me” gets rewritten as “sticks and stones may break my bones / but chains and whips excite me.” Co-writer Ester Dean has explained the origin of that line directly: “I remembered I’d seen something that said, ‘Sticks and stones may break my bones.’ Then came ‘But chains and whips excite me.’ And I’m like, ‘Oh, my God, I got to write that’” 1. That reworking is the engine of the whole song, turning a childhood defense against bullying into a boast about getting off on judgment and provocation.

Read that way, the S&M imagery in the chorus and title works less as a literal inventory of sexual acts and more as shorthand for pleasure taken in pain, criticism, and being labeled “bad.” Lines like “Feels so good being bad” and “now the pain is my pleasure” extend the same idea beyond the bedroom, framing scrutiny, controversy, and being out of line as things Rihanna has learned to enjoy rather than fear.

Notably, the song’s lyrics shouldn’t be taken literally in a sexual way 1, which supports reading “S&M” as metaphor rather than autobiography or a literal endorsement of bondage and discipline. The title’s shock value and the chorus’s explicit-sounding language function as provocation itself, daring the listener to react, which mirrors the song’s own thesis that being “bad” and drawing criticism is exactly the point.

Ultimately, “S&M” plays as a wink: it takes a phrase meant to teach kids to shrug off insults and flips it into a celebration of thriving on attention, good or bad. The chains-and-whips hook 1 is the clearest evidence of that intent, a piece of wordplay built to be catchy, cheeky, and defiant all at once, rather than a straightforward confession about sexual preferences 1.

Last updated 2026-08-21